“You Need to do Better”

“You need to do better.”

The context doesn’t matter. Just the words.

I thought it didn’t bother me, but apparently it really did because here I am writing about it a couple of weeks later after it has churned and churned in my head…eating away at my joy.

Better.

Better?

Who’s definition? Your’s? Society’s? Mine? My husband’s? God’s?

What’s “better,” and is it even possible?

Continue reading ““You Need to do Better””

Here we go…Again

The power surged.  I don’t know how I can hear power as it goes OUT, but I can.

It did it again.

Again.

No, no, no, no…I have to save water.  We have a well.

I rush from the bed, run into the bathroom, close the drain, and set the water to run full blast.  I hurry upstairs to do the same.  All this running water.  I have to GO.  What time is it?

All is quiet in the house.  Wow, this house DOES see quiet.  I miss the stillness because it happens during the rare, few hours when my eyes are closed, my brain able to rest.  Is it this peaceful every night at this time?  What an emptiness.  In a few hours, the silence will pass.  Whether there is a hum from the furnace as it continues to warm my family, or it dies from an outage caused by too much strain from icy branches on lines, I won’t notice it’s absent sound in a few hours.  It will be overshadowed by much larger, bouncing, boisterous sounds.  An audible noise will return to this house.  Power or not, tranquility won’t last long.  The kids will wake, and all will be alive and “running” shortly.  Their power is never out.  The sun WILL rise, and they will be fully charged, ready to face the day.

They wear me out.  Some days I don’t doubt that I will go crazy.

Continue reading “Here we go…Again”

The Rain Falls Down

Storms can be hard. Ok, they can be downright frightening.
Drip……..…….drip………………drip………..
The rain is beginning to fall.
….drip……….drip………drop……drip…….
It falls, falls, falls from the sky, making its way to the tiny leaf,
the one that is just barely hanging on…that’s how I feel some days.
It’s hanging on as firmly as it can, trying not to let go….
Drip…drip…drip…drop…drip…..drip….
From the leaf to the ground the tiny drop falls, lost…
Drip….drop…..drip……drop…..drip….
Faster now the drops come, I can hear them on the roof.
Drop…drop…drop…drip…drip….drop…
They begin puddling. Those tiny drops are lost no more,
They are found, they are joined by others on a similar journey….
drip..drop…drip….drop..drip….drop….
The wind picks up,
The trees bend, dance…
The power flickers and with each plunge into darkness,
We wonder…wait.
Continue reading “The Rain Falls Down”

My Frozen Pond is no Skating Rink

It can be deceiving.  Ice on a pond.  One quick glimpse out the upstairs window will have you believe that you have your own personal ice rink.  It appears that the entire surface of the water is one solid piece of ice.  That gleaning sheet even supports the weight of your ducks.  Leaves are blowing and sliding across the flawless smoothness, not a drop of water to touch them.  You walk outside, brave the wind and cold, to get a better look.  Upon closer inspection, realizing that appearances are often deceiving.  A single, tiny movement from a duck’s foot causes a small portion of the surface to break.  He dives in, triggering a little more to chip off into the icy water, in his excitement to get to the keeper of the food.  He swims and swims in this new pool that he has created, but it is just a mere fraction of what he is used to.  He is confused at the wonder as well.  It is also his first frozen pond experience.

So often in life, we can be deceived by appearances.  Things look perfect, flawless.

Continue reading “My Frozen Pond is no Skating Rink”

Seeking the Greatest Treasure

I wanted something new…

Something different…

Something that would stick in their little minds and hearts…

Something worth remembering…

I wanted to start a new Christmas tradition, something for “my children.”  I wanted something to encompass, fully, who they are and allow them to experience Christmas.

We have traditions.

We have Santa.  Santa DOES come to our house and bring gifts, but he’s never overly extravagant.

We have an elf and a shepherd.  My kids enjoy them both.  Neither are naughty.  They both encourage my kids to have a giving spirit and spread the true love and purpose of the Christmas season.

I let the kids purchase or make small gifts for each other, for their father and me, and for their grandparents.

We always pick out a real tree for the family and the kids get to decorate one of their own.

We read stories and sing songs.

We do advent activities and make ornaments.

We bake cookies and candy.

We sing Happy Birthday to Jesus on Christmas morning.

It’s all fun.  I LOVE it ALL.  But I needed something that was unique to “them.”  Continue reading “Seeking the Greatest Treasure”

Are We There Yet?

“Are we there yet?”

“No.”

“When will we be there?”

“When we get there.”

“Is it the next stop sign?”

“Not even close.”

“How much farther?”

“305 miles.”

“How many feet is that?”

Really? Did she just ask me that? She really DID ask me that. She told me to “Google it.” She’s five.

Every journey is paved with anticipation. Some journeys are filled with an eagerness to arrive, others with anxiety for the trip and what lies ahead. We all want to know, “When are we going to get there?”

Continue reading “Are We There Yet?”

This Old House

I like old houses.  They are intriguing.

Do you know the kind of houses that I am talking about?  The kinds that are vacant, varying stages of repair.  Some have been refurbished, others are just a shell of what once was, barely holding together.  You wonder how much longer it can stand before finally letting go.  I’m referring to the old houses that you look at and think, “Wow!  In its day, I bet that was an AWESOME house.”

Not only are they fun to photograph and walk through, but sometimes I find myself just staring through the old windows and wondering…

Continue reading “This Old House”

Behind the Scene Santa

I’ve been seeing a lot of cute posts and pictures, reading a lot of words of kindness and encouragement, for delivery men this season.  I get it.  Trust me!!!  I am eternally thankful to MY delivery guys AND GALS for all the hard work that they put in, especially during the Christmas season.  I, a stay-home, homeschooling mom of four children, rarely get the chance to go to a store alone, like NEVER.  I have ordered all my gifts this year…and last year…and the year before.  I am on the “Thank a Delivery Guy” bandwagon and I am tooting the horn…the kids are banging the drums.

BUT, I want to take it a step further…further UP the chain…

I’d also like to shine the spotlight on another group of people…a very LARGE, incredibly important group of people.  You could say that they are the grease that keeps the crazy mouse-wheel that we are on spinning.  They are overlooked A LOT.  In fact, they are often looked down on.  They are grumbled and complained about more often than any positive or loving word is said about them….at least from the mouths and keyboards of people that I see.

The Santas that I want to tip my hat to remain hidden away, behind the scenes.

Truck drivers.

No, not just DELIVERY truck drivers, but also the big-rigs, 18-wheelers, over the road truckers.  These are the drivers who sleep in dark truck stops or vacant lots, away from their families for weeks, sometimes months, on end.  Most of them don’t know from one day to the next where their “home” is going to be parked, it’s all dictated by the all-powerful clock.  They are battling a schedule that was borderline impossible to keep, right from the start of their current run.

Continue reading “Behind the Scene Santa”

Help Wanted

It was a life-line. It was what I needed. The phone call, “I have a question for you.”

A question? What kind of question? Who starts a conversation that way? What does she need ME to DO?

“Do you want to come over tonight for dinner?”

What? Dinner? Hallelujah, YES!!!

It had been one of “those” weeks. Day-light savings just ended (mommy nightmare), three cars in and out of the shop, an electrical issue in the kitchen, every BIG bill that could be due was due, rain, rain, rain, stuck inside…

This mama was in a physical and emotional slump and she needed something, anything. Dinner with a friend, that I didn’t have to cook. Someone else’s house. Someone else’s messes…SCORE!!!

Continue reading “Help Wanted”